Summer 2015 Book Challenge: July Check-In

I am proud to say, July was one of my best reading months on record!

Check out my Preliminary List here.

(July 1, 2015) 25 points: Read a book that is part of a series with at least four books. | The No. 1 Ladies' Detective Agency by Alexander McCall Smith (235 pages, ★★★★)

This was a book that I most likely wouldn't normally read. Mystery generally isn't a genre I seek out, but I found it a surprisingly enjoyable read. I found the protagonist, a female detective from Botswana to be very likable and the read was light and pleasant. I would definitely read more from this series in the future. 

(July 7, 2015) 20 points: Read a book with the name of a city, state or country in the title. | Looking for Alaska by John Green (221 pages, ★★★)

My expectations were high since like everyone else, I loved The Fault in our Stars. I think if my angsty, existential teenage self has read this, I would have rated it higher, but it was just kind of mediocre for me. 

(July 8, 2015) 5 points: Freebie! Read any book that fits the general rules. | Down the Rabbit Hole by Holly Madison (352 pages, ★★★)

I love Holly Madison, and will continue to love Holly Madison, but I do think she may have overdone it playing the victim card. I have no doubt that much of her retelling of her time at the Mansion was true, but I think she neglected to include the positive aspects of the experience, choosing to focus only on the negatives and shirk responsibility for her decisions.

That being said, I stayed up past 2am to finish this in one sitting. Holly has a very likable writing style and if you're looking for a guilty pleasure read, this is a good one!  

(July 23, 2015) 15 points: Read a book with "light" or "dark" in the title. | The Christmas Light by Donna VanLiere (224 pages, ★★)

I received this book around Christmastime through a Goodreads giveaway. Honestly, it should have been a really quick read, but I struggled to get through it. It was written in the third person omniscient point-of-view which felt really weird and awkward to read. I know VanLiere's books have been made into Hallmark channel movies in the past and it felt like she was writing the script for another cheesy Christmas movie.

It does get two stars for warm fuzzies, however. I needed something light after finishing the super dark, The Girl on the Train, so this did the trick!

PREVIOUS POINTS: 80
TOTAL POINTS: 145

July also kicked off Erin's Book Challenge! Although Erin is also a blogger and another self-described book challenge addict, her challenge format is Facebook-based and really interactive which I love. She also maintains albums of the all the different books picked so members of the group can go in at any point and see how books have been rated by other challenge participants. If you're interested in joining another book challenge, hers is a good one!

(July 1, 2015) 15 points: A book with a number in the title  | The No. 1 Ladies' Detective Agency by Alexander McCall Smith (235 pages, ★★★★)

(July 7, 2015) 10 points: A book with a three word title | Looking for Alaska by John Green (221 pages, ★★★) 

(July 8, 2015) 5 points: Freebie! Read any book that fits the general rules. | Down the Rabbit Hole by Holly Madison (352 pages, ★★★)

(July 22, 2015) 10 points // A book with one of the following words in the title: "girl(s)," "boy(s)," "wo(man)," "wo(men)" | The Girl on the Train by Paula Hawkins (323 pages, ★★★)

I chose this book for the "suspense" category in the Literary Ladies Book Challenge (see below), otherwise I probably wouldn't have read this book. I like books that leave me with the warm fuzzies, so this was not my cup of tea. I did find it well-written and suspenseful. For fans of Gone Girl, this would be a good recommendation. However, there were several graphic/violence scenes that I had a difficult time listening to (I "read" the audiobook). I would not recommend this book to someone who had a history of abuse, or was sensitive to violence.

PREVIOUS POINTS: 0
TOTAL POINTS: 40

Just when you thought I was done, I obviously have to include my reads for the Literary Ladies Book Challenge (Go here to see my Preliminary List):

(July 1, 2015) A book with a non-U.S. author | The No. 1 Ladies' Detective Agency by Alexander McCall Smith (235 pages, ★★★★) 

(July 8, 2015) A book written by a comedian or celebrity | Down the Rabbit Hole by Holly Madison (352 pages, ★★★)

(July 22, 2015) A suspenseful book – a mystery, a thriller, a book about revenge!  | The Girl on the Train by Paula Hawkins (323 pages, ★★★) 

BOOKS COMPLETED: 4/10

Images courtesy of GoodReads.com

#tbt: A Letter to my Former Single Self (January 25, 2013)

Because don't we all wish we could go back in time and give some much-needed wisdom to our single selves?

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Dear Kaity Bee,   Hello from the future! I've waited so long to write to you, and nearly 5 months into your marriage at 24 years old (That's right 24...you're not going to die alone, hooray!), now seems the absolute perfect timing.   I'm writing to you, because I know how hurt you are. I understand your trust issues. I get why you're uncomfortable just being in a room alone with an older man. I'm sorry you're so scared.

  It's a lonely place to be- in your own world of brokenness and keeping up the facade of being strong. But, I have news for you- those instincts will serve you well.   Some men suck. Some men will cut you down with words and make you feel worthless. Some men will treat you as a sexual object and not even acknowledge your inner beauty. Some men will take advantage of your pure and genuine nature. Some men will take all you have to give and then abandon you when it suits them. Some men have done this to you, and you have every right to feel begrudged.   But here's the thing: cling on to those feelings of distrust. Be skeptical of a man's intentions. Not only will it protect you from the skeezeballs of the world, but one day a man will come along who will be the exception. The night you meet your husband, you'll know.

  You'll know that this is the one you've been waiting for. This is the man who puts all others to shame. This is the man who will care for you like no man ever has before. This is the man who you can trust to always be true, good and kind. This is the man who tells you how beautiful you are every day, but has fallen deeper in love with the beauty of your soul.   There will come a day when the walls you've built around your heart will come tumbling down. All because you've met a man who will work tirelessly to remove it, brick by brick. Don't change a thing about yourself, because it will all lead you to him.   Love, Blissfully married Kaity  

#Collaboreads: Looking for Alaska

Linking up this morning with Amber for #CollaboReads!

Riveting.What part of the book could you NOT get enough of? 

There were few aspects of the book that I felt "riveted" by and the ones I did, came at the end, after the point which would reveal a major spoiler, so I'm going to pass on this one.

Elements.How did you relate to/care for the characters?What's your thought on the plot line and twists and turns? 

I think this was one of my biggest issues with the book, I didn't relate to or care for any of the characters. I know with YA, you're going to be in the heads of teenagers and teenagers happen to be developmentally, a little egocentric. But, the angst, the existential "What is my purpose on this earth?" the self-pity, it was all a little much for me.

Associate.What other books are like this one?If none, did it remind you of a particular TV or movie with it's themes and characters? Does it serendipitous-ly line-up with things going on in your life or the news right now? 

There isn't anything that immediately comes to mind to compare it to, so the closest thing I would choose would be for those who liked The Catcher in the Rye.

Design.You know you judged this book by the cover.What did you think of it? How did it relate to the contents of the novel? And the font and layout of the pages? 

This is probably the one category that will get a big ol' stamp of approval from me. I thought the cover was well-done- it fit in really well with the content of the book, while providing an air of mystery. 

Stars. How many out of five do you give this book?Would you recommend this book to a friend? 

This gets a whopping ★★★ stars from me! Unless you're a huge John Green fan, I'd say you can pass on this one.

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Check back on Friday to see the rest of my July reads!

7 Months as Mommy

My baby boy is 7 months today. He's practically a grown man!!!

WORK

I officially went back to working 40 hours this month. It's not easy, but I feel like we're finally sinking into some sort of a rhythm with balancing work and parenthood. 

BREASTFEEDING

Still going at it! I've definitely noticed an increase in Charlie's appetite, especially at night before bed. Some nights I nurse him and then have to give him another 5 ounce bottle because he's still hungry! I'm not producing as much as I would like to so I don't know how much longer we're going to be able to keep this up. 

BABY FAT

The 40-hour work week has killed any time and/or energy I might have had to work on this. Normally, when I want to lose weight, I just kind of naturally start cutting back on calories. But, I can't do that because I'm breastfeeding and barely making enough breastmilk as it is. Which leaves exercise. No progress there. I think I'm going to make a point to make Saturdays and Sundays my workout days for the time being. I figure, 2 days a week is better than zero. Who knows, I may start getting addicted to running again and want to wake up in the morning for a jog around the neighborhood before work (Ha!).

As for Charlie...

MILESTONES

Not crawling yet, but man is he a Rolie Polie Olie! Other things he loves? Doing backbends to check out what's going on behind him. Grabbing at everything in sight (especially Mommy's hair and earrings and Daddy's beard).

This month, we finally started getting giggles out of him. He's always been a smiley, happy baby, but for some reason the laughter came slowly. It's still a rarity, but when Daddy tickles him, that little laugh comes out and it is so infectious!

Solid foods are still a struggle. He's pretty much figured out the eating thing by now, but that doesn't mean he makes it easy on us. So far it seems, his favorite food has been green beans!

FAMILY

Charlie continues to spend his days with his Aunt Ashlee (who we affectionately refer to as, Aunt Mommy) and his cousin Lucie. Lucie is now going on six months, so she's so much more aware and it's the sweetest thing to watch the two of them interact. They adore each other! His Aunt Kelly also came up for a weekend and watched him all day long on Friday while Mommy and Daddy were at work. They had so much fun together, but all that playing wore little Charlie out. He was asleep by 6pm!

STATS

At Charlie's 6-month appointment, he weighed in at 13 lbs 8 oz, so I'm guessing he's upwards of 14 lbs by now. Surprise, surprise- he is still a peanut. All of his 3-6 month clothes have been packed up, and even some of his 6 month. He's now somewhere between 6-9 month clothing and in Size 2 diapers.

Life Lately

It's nearly 3:00am as I write this. I have to be up in about an hour to make an 8 hour roundtrip drive to an appointment on the Eastern border of Ohio. I'm up because I fell asleep on the couch around 8:00pm watching The Bachelorette and eating cheese sticks and summer sausage for dinner (this was an all-time low, even for me). I never can sleep through the night on our sofa. No matter how tired I am, it's like my subconscious knows that the couch is for napping, not for sleeping.

I've had so much to say and so much swirling around in my mind that I would love to get out on my blog. Time, it seems, will always be an issue for me. Alas, I am resorting to a "Life Lately" post because it's better than nothing, right?

WORK

Last week, I finally returned to a regular, 40-hour work week. I've maintained a flex schedule since returning from maternity leave which has been incredible in terms of easing me back into my professional life. Am I excited about the change? Not necessarily. Do I acknowledge that my position requires 40 hours a week of my time? Totally. I can't overstate how much I love my job, so I'm doin' what I gotta do.

HEALTH

I've been struggling badly as of late to try and maintain a healthy lifestyle. I have a gym membership that hasn't been used because I honestly don't know how or when to go. Chuck is in a band with his brothers so two nights of the week are spent practicing and performing, which means I'm on house arrest with my little sleeping cherub. The other weeknights vary. Some times Chuck wants to go visit with family, some times it's been entirely too long since we've seen each other so we opt to stay in for a much-needed, marriage-centric evening. This leaves the weekends, which lets face it, are possible, but not ideal.

Generally, I'm a poster child for local, healthful, organic eating. Lately? Yep, those are 10 boxes of mac & cheese and freezer meals in my shopping cart. I don't like eating this way, it makes me feel like crud and the fact that I had to buy the next size up when I could no longer fit into the few pairs of shorts I own just added insult to injury. I don't care about the number on the scale. What I care about is that I'm giving my body the nourishment it needs, and giving Charlie the nourishment he needs a la breastmilk. I'm not and I don't feel like myself. I feel slugglish, frumpy, and out of shape.

(This is where I could really use some tips, advice, suggestions from fellow working Mamas- how do you keep yourself eating right and working out???)

BEAUTY

This is a weird category, but I couldn't think of anything better to label my recent upgrade. I have always had ridiculously thick hair, which admittedly can be really nice. But with as busy as I've been, it became nearly impossible for me to keep up with it. Nine times out of ten, I threw it up in a bun with some bobby pins to hold back my bangs for good measure. Last Wednesday, it had been nearly a week since I had even brushed it and I was DONE. I love having long hair, but it's only nice if I actually do something with it. So, I called, made an appointment for that evening and chopped off eight inches of my thick, unruly mane. My hairdresser was a bit cautious because most people doing that drastic of a change have reservations. I had zero reservations and I am in love with my short, easily manageable new 'do.

Traded in 8 inches of dead weight for a fabulous new #momdo. Oh. Em. Gee. I love it! #toobaditwillneverlooklikethisagain

A photo posted by Kaity Stuckert (@beeautifulblessings) on Jul 15, 2015 at 5:16pm PDT

MARRIAGE

Chuck and I have been really trying to be more intentional about making time for each other. With us both working full-time in different cities, as well as Chuck's musically-inclined extracurriculars, we rarely see each other. It was getting to the point where the few hours a week that we did see each other were spent discussing household logistics, finances, etc. Or we were just plain cranky and snapping at each other. We were both feeling strained and disconnected and mutually agreed that we need to make our marriage a priority above all else going on in our life. Needless to say, our evening spent together cuddled up on the couch last night was completely restorative.

CHARLIE

My little guy is doing great. His 7-month "birthday" is just days away, so more details to come. But, after over a month of trying to get this kid to eat solids, we're finally having some success in this arena.

I think it's safe to say, #babypep has finally mastered the whole solid food thang. Man, did he put up a good fight, but these green beans finally did him in!  #6monthsold #proudmama #pressplay  #thingsonlymomscareabout

A video posted by Kaity Stuckert (@beeautifulblessings) on Jul 20, 2015 at 11:29am PDT

FAMILY

My house is a wreck and it's gotten to the point where it's so bad that I don't even know where to start. My sister politely (although maybe not genuinely) offered to come up and help me organize. I promptly took her up on it, bribing her with baby snuggles and we spent all last weekend together. I think total, she packed up 3 boxes of non-essentials for me, but we got to have a dinner & movie date to see Trainwreck on Friday night and spent Sunday evening watching Parts 1 and 2 of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, so I'm calling it a win!

"We all know one." Right, @kelly_best? Everyone go see this movie now. So funny! #trainwreck #ilovemyseester

A photo posted by Kaity Stuckert (@beeautifulblessings) on Jul 17, 2015 at 10:10pm PDT

Life lately has been exhausting to say the least, but such a (bee)autiful blessing ♥

Dear Kaity, You Are Strong

Dear Kaity,

When you sat on the couch in your stained pajama shirt and looked with mild horror at the layer of dirt on your living room floor, I know it was hard to give yourself grace, but you did it anyway. You're a hard worker.

When you snapped at your husband for helping out a family member, when you selfishly want all his time for yourself, you apologized and forgave yourself. You're a good wife.

When you plopped Charlie down on the floor to gaze at the harsh lighting emitting from Richard Scarry's cartoons on the television set and worried about somehow permanently destroying his brain cells, you let it go. You're a good Mom.

When those size 6 shorts you tried on at American Eagle were just a bit too snug, forcing you to buy the next size up, I know you felt frumpy. You wondered if you would ever get back into running and eating anything but freezer meals and takeout. Relax, you are beautiful.

When working full-time feels like too much. When your evenings with Charlie seem too short. When your marriage seems strained and disconnected, take a breath. Give yourself grace. You are strong.

Love,
Well, you

Blogger Love v.10

Oy! It's been a hot minute since I've rounded up my favorite blog posts, but I seriously love doing these posts because there is so much goodness to be found in the blogosphere! So, I won't ramble on for too long, but here have been my favorite posts as of late:

Food As a Love Language by musicalpoem | Because food is my love language and this post was simply lovely.

Buying Your First DSLR by Oak & Oats | Occasionally, I'll read an actual, practical blog post. I've been wanting to invest in a good DSLR for awhile now, but dang they are expensive! This is a good post to come back to whenever that time does come for me... *sigh*

5 Things to Say to the Working Moms in Your Life by (mis)adventures | Hello?! Have you met me? I'm a freaking mess of a working mama and this post brought real tears to my eyes. So. Much. Yes.

Six Tips for Rebuilding Your Credit Score by Still Being Molly | Trust. I need this one, bad. Another one of those shiny gems of a blog post, with actual, practical information.

The Big News! by The Falcon's Nest | She doesn't know it yet, but I'm determined to make Nicole my blogging bestie. She's one of those bloggers who I feel like was meant to be an IRL friend and I am soooo excited that she's going to be adding to her brood. (Nicole, if you're reading this, sorry I'm so creepy...and also about the morning sickness).

Why I Feel Guilty about Being Pregnant by Katie Did What | This post resonated with me so much. I actually kind of lost touch with a couple women in my life who were struggling with infertility at the time that I became pregnant with Charlie. Through no fault of their own, but the guilt I felt just overwhelmed me and I wound up being a total asshat and distancing myself from them altogether. 

Go Set a Watchman by Begin Anyway | To Kill a Mockingbird is my all-time favorite book, so after all the controversy surrounding Harper Lee's recent publication, I decided against reading it. If you've been on the fence, this is a really good post that helps to clarify and set the record straight about Go Set a Watchman.

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Do tell- what bloggers have you been loving on lately?

Charlie's First July 4th and Trip to NY!

Please excuse while I do a mini-photo dump. I know this is coming like a week late, but hello, have I mentioned I have a baby? July 4th weekend was the first that both Chuck and I could get a 4-day weekend. He started a new job just a couple months ago and didn't want to take any time off being the "new guy" and all. However, when the opportunity presented itself to take a trip up to visit my family in Upstate New York, there was no passing it up. This was the first time Charlie got to meet his Grandpa (my Dad), who is disabled and can't travel. He also got to go to his first pool party and hang out with his Grandpa (my step-dad), Grandma, and Aunt Kelly.

It was such a wonderful little respite for Chuck and I. It was the closest thing to a vacation we've had in about a year. We visited the sweet little town of Skaneatles, Saturday night was spent over Bud Light Razberitas and Cards Against Humanity with my family, and on Sunday night, we were so excited to have willing and (free!) babysitters that we made sure to escape to Dave & Buster's for a much-needed date night.

A 19-hour roundtrip drive with a six month old was no easy feat, but Charlie did so great. We're planning to spend Thanksgiving with my family this year, so it's good to know that Charlie can handle such a long drive! As promised, just a few pictures of some my fam-damily.

27 Things You (Probably Don't) Need to Know About Me

I'm just sitting here staring at this new blog design. I've wanted to revamp my blog for some time, but was just too stingy to do so. The time finally came, and it feels like a breath of fresh air, like starting from scratch. In honor of this turning over of a new leaf, I thought I would re-introduce myself as the new-and-improved, Kaity of (Bee)autiful Blessings.

1. I'm 27 years old. Hence the 27 things to know. Most days, I still feel 16...until I get around teenagers, and bam! I feel ancient. It's still unreal to me that I'm old enough to be married and have a child, but I am the happiest I've ever been, so bring it on, 28!

2. I never thought I'd get married. Not necessarily that I never wanted to, I just honestly never thought I'd find the right guy for me. I dated one guy before Chuck, and mostly just because I was 19 and had never had a boyfriend before. I was never crazy about anyone, let alone in love with anyone. But I knew right away that Chuck was something special, so it didn't take long for us to get engaged!

3. I'm a domestic violence survivor. Seriously. I spent most of my teen years living with an abusive alcoholic. You can read more of my story here.

4. I think I have a legitimate chocolate addiction. I eat dark chocolate after (and sometimes instead of) dinner almost every night. Sometimes I have Chuck run out and buy me a chocolate bar because I get weird and antsy if I don't have it.

5. I once bungee jumped over the Nile River. It lasted about 7 seconds, but is one of my most brag-worthy life experiences. 

6. I'm in love with the month of December. I've always been a freak about Christmas, but I met my husband in December 2010, and then had Charlie in December 2014 so it's become extra special to me over the years.

7. My Dad is disabled. My parents announced they were getting divorced when I was 10 years old, and about a month later, my Dad suffered a debilitating stroke that has left him unable to speak and/or use the right side of the body. His health continues to worsen, and honestly, I don't talk about him much because I really struggle with the fact that he's still alive.

8. I have a thing for elephants. Which you may have already noticed, but I like to think they're my spirit animal. They are intelligent, loyal, and family-oriented and are to me, the most majestic, magnificent creatures on the planet. I got the opportunity to see elephants up close on a safari in Uganda, and I was easily the most awestruck I've ever been in my life.

9. My 21st birthday was a little atypical. You can read more about it here, but basically, I spent the morning preaching to a church of Rwandan genocide survivors. Talk about a life-changing moment. 

10. I was a vegetarian for four years. Prompted by my experience in Uganda, I made the decision to stop eating meat, as I realized livestock production was a huge environmental issue. I actually miss it sometimes, but Chuck is a red-blooded, carnivore and needs his meat, so I started eating fish and poultry again once we were married because I was just too lazy to try and eat a completely separate diet.

11. I love classic rock. I love music in general, but I'm convinced I was born in the wrong generation. Led Zeppelin is my all-time favorite band, with Crosby, Stills and Nash following as a close second. 

12. I still feel like a total badass for having a natural birth.  Seriously, it was the craziest thing ever and I would do it again in a heartbeat. You can read all about Charlie's birth here.

13. I don't talk much about my faith. Because I still haven't figured it out. It's something I wrestle with constantly. Whether I believe that the Bible is the divine word of God, or whether it is a collection of stories written by ancient men. Whether believing in Jesus as the Messiah makes Judaism, Islam or Buddhism any less true. Whether there is a heaven or a hell. I believe in a higher power. I believe in kindness and compassion. I believe in love. Everything else is a bit of a gray area.

14. I'm obsessed with the TV show, Friends. I own all ten seasons and quote them almost daily. Bonus points to whomever can place this quote, "This is smack dab in the middle of the blue!" One of my favorite episodes, don't ask me why. 

15. If I was a millionaire, I'd probably spend all my money on food. I love food so much. I keep a mental list of my top five favorite meals of all time. Currently, there's a tie for first between my meal at The Girl and the Goat in Chicago and the Seafood Caesar Salad I had the night Chuck proposed. I'm salivating just thinking about it. 

16. My two favorite movies are Love Actually and Almost Famous. I have a new favorite couple every time I watch LA, which is often. It's just so...LOVE-ly. As for AF, my inner hippie lives vicariously through William's journey with Stillwater. I'm telling you- I was born in the wrong decade!

17. My favorite fictional character is Neville Longbottom. You can read more about why here. But also, Matthew Lewis. Oh. My. God.

18. I don't do scary. Scary movies, haunted houses, spooky mazes. I used to, because it's what my friends did. Now that I'm older, no way Jose. If I even see a scary movie trailer, I won't sleep all night. Strangely, though, I love Halloween.

19. I wanted to be a lawyer. I sat for my LSAT, applied to law school, interned at the Philadelphia District Attorney's Office, and then promptly realized I am way too shy and overly sensitive to be a lawyer. Some of the cases I sat in on completely wrecked me and I knew I could never handle it.

20. I don't really watch movies. Which sounds counter to #16, but they're just not my thing. I'd rather read or watch a TV series. 

21. I love my job. I work full-time at a non-profit where I get to help low-income folks access fresh, healthy food. The job is awesome. My co-workers are awesome. My employer is awesome. ...awesome.

22. I once slept outside the U.S. Supreme Court. It was to sit in on a hearing for my Constitutional Law class, but still. It was one of the most memorable nights of my life.

23. I used to be a cheerleader. I'm not very athletic, and I was never super good. But I got to be captain of my high school squad for four seasons and I loved it. I cheered my freshman year of college, but fell out of a stunt and dislocated my elbow and never really got back to my peak level. 

24. I love to write. You're probably thinking, duh. But I love to write and am weirdly kind of private about it because I can't handle any criticism (constructive, or not). One day I genuinely hope to be published.

25. I don't know how many children I want to have. I think either 2 or 4. But not 3, because I would never want one to feel left out. I think it would be fun to have a big family, but I'm also an introvert who loves quiet, so the two don't exactly mesh well together.

26. I've donated my hair 4 times. My hair is really thick, and grows really fast. I've been able to donate to Locks of Love four times in my life and will probably be doing it for a fifth time in the near future.

27. I hate odd numbers. If I'm pumping gas or leaving a tip, I have to round up to the nearest whole number. My alarms are set for 5:00, 5:20, and 5:40 AM. I can't explain it, I just hate them.

28. See #27. I couldn't leave off on an odd number, so bonus fact of the day is: My Mom and step-dad are riding over 3,500 miles next month to the attend the 75th Annual Sturgis Motorcycle Rally and are raising a dollar for every mile to benefit Love146. If you feel so inclined, I would love if you would "like" their Facebook page to support them. 

It's Pretty, It's Just So Pretty!

Did you know Erin at Love, Fun and Football does blog designing? Because she does.

And coincidentally, I can't stop staring at mine...

#tbt: 5 Fun Facts about Food and Sex (November 23, 2012)

About a million years ago (aka: 2011), I went to grad school for a Masters degree in Food Studies. I attended for one year and then dropped out because 1. I realized I couldn't actually afford grad school and 2. No one knows what Food Studies is and I could get the job I wanted without a Master's degree. That being said, I loved my grad program and one day, would love to go back and finish my degree. One of my favorite research papers I wrote was for a class in Food Writing which examined the relationship between sex and food. I.e. The most fun paper to write...ever!

These are a couple of the fun things I learned: 

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In the midst of post-Spring Break research paper-writing hell, I am finding joy in small things. As much as trying to cram 25 pages worth of last-minute researching and writing can suck the life out of you, the fact is, writing a paper about the relationship between sex and food is awesome.

Here are some of the fun facts I've stumbled upon throughout my research thus far.

1. Flavor is linked to color. 

In colorless taste tests, participants had trouble determining common flavors without the aid of visual cues (i.e. Purple=grape, Red=cherry).

2. It has been found that a passion for food may translate into...other areas. 

Apparently, chefs make excellent lovers. Time to get our hubbies in the kitchen! ;)

3. Obesity may be a sign of sexual difficulty/dysfunction. 

Often times, people will substitute food for sex.

4. The way in which a person eats, may indicate their potential in the bedroom. 

Someone who races through a meal may not be a great second-date candidate.

5. Certain smells increase blood flow to the penis. 

Researchers were surprised to find that the most effective scent was...pumpkin pie!

It's fascinating how inextricably linked food and sex are and it is unsurprising that someone who seeks pleasure and passion out of life would be able to make such a connection.

Be sure to stay tuned for more fun tidbits as my research continues to take shape and as I take things into my own hands with some aphrodisiac recipes. Things could get spicy around here!

(Side note: This was such a fun paper to write and definitely had me thinking differently about the dessert options this Thanksgiving week ;)

Having a Baby Made it Harder to Love my Husband: An Essay

I lay there, shaking from the adrenaline of pushing a living, breathing, squishy, sweet little ball of human out of my body, while my husband looked on helplessly. He cradled our new son, Charlie, while the nurses and midwives buzzed around us at what felt like 60 mph. We were discharged 2 days later, and we were a united front as we exited the hospital doors and proceeded to cluelessly strap our 6-lb miracle into his brand new car seat.

I had heard many a snarky comment from the Mamas who had gone before me, so when my dear husband slept through our baby’s 1am, 3am and 5am cries, I was surprised to find it didn’t bother me. I liked being the sole person responsible for nourishing my blessed boy, and I figured if Daddy was well-rested, Mommy could sleep in! Our system worked for us and eventually we settled into a rhythm and got used to our amazing cherub of a son who began sleeping through the night at 8 weeks.

As maternity leave wound down, I hysterically sobbed every night into my husband’s chest as he threw out every solution in the book to ease my aching heart. Deep down, we both knew the truth- I was going back to work; I had to go back to work. My heart was broken to leave my baby, and his heart broke to see me in so much pain. Not long after, working full-time became my new normal, and still, we carried on as a team. Daddy took the morning shift, delivering Charlie to his sitter as I traversed the 50 miles to work. Mommy took the night shift, rocking baby boy as the breastmilk drunkenness overcame him and his sweet, pink eyelids drooped with sleepiness.

Then one day, I thought about my boys. I thought about our future and I thought about our present. I thought about how I loved my son more than my husband; and it stunned me. How did I get to this point? We had ventured into the unknown realms of parenthood as a team. We had said we would always have a marriage-centric family. We knew deep down, that the success and happiness of our little one(s) would have much to do with the success and happiness of their parent’s relationship. Yet here I was, hopelessly in love with a blue-eyed, bald-headed, toothless little man and his Daddy was coming in second. I never admitted this to my husband. I just pleaded for an opportunity for a date night.

The fateful night arrived, and I eagerly anticipated a romantic dinner filled with adult conversation, a make-out session at our local drive-in and some long overdue sex to cap off our evening, before we inevitably drifted to sleep in each other’s arms. Our dinner was interrupted by friends, the center console dug into my ribs each time I tried to deliver a kiss and needless to say, by the time we relieved the sitter at 11:30pm, the only thing our bed would be seeing, was sleep. Yet, when I awoke the next morning, I felt revived. Our long-awaited date was nothing as I had envisioned, but I was struck with the profound notion that I had been wrong all along. I didn’t love my son more than my husband. I loved him differently.

I never had to love my baby boy, it was never a decision I had to make. The instant he was born, the love was just there. The primal Mama Bear instinct was awakened, and love was something that overcame me. My love for my husband, on the other hand, was something I chose to do every day. I realized that loving my husband would be harder. I would hold him to a higher standard when he hurt me. I would get frustrated with him more easily. I would reserve my anger for him because I knew he could take it. Despite all of that, for each time I overcame resentment, and instead met him with grace, I was making a choice. A choice to look past the murky, ugly parts and instead, embrace the parts that made him the best Daddy and best husband for our family. Nuzzling my face into my snuggly, little bear cub is love made easy. Loving my flawed, occasionally annoying, and oblivious Papa Bear is harder, but the fact that I get to wake up every morning and decide, “Do I love my husband today? Oh, hell yes!” is what makes it so, so, so worthwhile.

6 Months as Mommy

WORK

I finally feel like I'm starting to get caught up (which has only taken me MONTHS!). Summertime is my busy season so I'm definitely looking forward to September/October when things die down a little bit. I'm tired, my commute is still annoying, but I have the most supportive supervisor in the world, so I'm genuinely happy where I'm at. This month, I started contemplating doing some freelance stuff on the side to supplement our income, but we'll see how that goes.

BREASTFEEDING

I definitely noticed my supply decreasing this month. Perhaps, because my work schedule has gotten a little more regular so I'm pumping more? I've been working really hard to try and keep it up, by drinking water whenever I think about it, and keeping a box of cereal bars in my desk drawer so I have something to snack on when I don't have time to eat. Honestly, if I wasn't breastfeeding, I think I would legit forget to eat 50% of the time.

BABY FAT

We did get a new gym membership this month, though admittedly, we haven't used it as much as we should have. I have such a love/hate relationship with the gym. I love that it gets me out of the house and into an environment where I actually feel motivated to exercise, but I hate that all of the machines are so intimidating and all the crazy, bodybuilding guys are always taking over everything. I'm pretty boring when it comes to working out at the gym. I get on the treadmill and walk/jog for about two miles and then do some crunches and stretches. See, I told you- BORING. Our gym offers a few classes here and there, but the effort it takes to figure out what to do with Charlie so I can go, is far more than the effort it takes to sit on my couch with a book while Charlie snoozes in his crib.

As for Charlie...

Channeling his namesake

MILESTONES

I can barely keep up with this kid! Although he's not mobile yet, he's pretty darn good at rolling all over the place. When I get him out of this crib in the morning, he's usually 90-180 degrees from where he started the night before.

His biggest achievement, however, has been starting solid foods!!! Our pediatrician suggested starting him on rice cereal, but after doing a little bit of reading, I decided to forego the grains and cereals for some good ol' fashioned fruits and veggies. So far we've had success with sweet potatoes and avocado. I'm looking forward to introducing a bunch more foods in the weeks to come!

Another huge milestone? Talking! I am proud to say that Baby Peps's first word was...MAMA! Since then we've struggled to try and get him to say anything other than "Bah, bah, bah, bah, bah...," but we know he can also make "M" and "D" noises, so we're working on that every day.

FAMILY

Charlie has loved spending his days with his aunt and cousin, and we can now officially say that he got his first kiss from his cousin Lucie! The two of these babies are so stinkin' adorable. I'm just so blessed that they get to grow up together. Charlie also helped his Daddy and Papaw celebrate Father's Day! Father's Day morning was pretty lazy and relaxed, just the way Daddy wanted it. Then we went over to his Papaw's house for a family dinner and some quality time with his paternal grandpa.

STATS
At Charlie's 6-month appointment, he weighed in at 13 lbs 8 oz, 26 inches, with a 43cm head circumference. This puts him at the 1st, 25th, and 25th percentiles, respectively. Although, he's still super tiny, his pediatrician was actually really happy to see that he's put on 1.5 lbs since his last appointment and he's still following the growth curve. Grow Charlie, grow!

And just for fun, lots of outtakes from our little Charlie Brown's 6-month photoshoot: