CROSBY | 5 Months

STAY-AT-HOME MOTHERHOOD

Man, a LOT has happened in the last month. I've been trying to get some work-from-home side projects going to get more involved in my community, as well as earn a little bit of supplemental income. There is a lot that is still up in the air so I don't want to broadcast anything just yet (but stay tuned!). Let's just say, this Mama is going to have her plate full!

BREASTFEEDING

Up until a few nights ago, Crosby was still waking up on average every three hours to eat. I'm happy to report he's started sleeping 7-ish hour stretches! I trusted my Mama's intuition on his sleep habits and just trusted that he would figure out the whole sleep thing on his own, and he did! He finally did! 

BABY FAT

I'm still maintaining a weight that makes me happy, but this winter weather has not been good for my activity level. I finally broke down and signed up for a free 30-day trial with Daily Burn. Charlie and I tried kickboxing together. And although he preferred climbing all over Mommy when she was planking, I actually enjoyed it more than I thought I would. I've never enjoyed working out from home, but since it's currently my only option, I'm giving it a shot!

As for Crosby...

LIFE

With so many side projects happening, I'm on my computer and phone all day long. Sometimes I really have to remind myself after hour three of Daniel Tiger's Neighborhood to back away from the screen and actually spend some quality time with my kids. It's harder to accomplish than it sounds because I'm someone who thrives on feeling productive and accomplished. There's no feeling of productivity from tickle fights and reading Little Blue Truck (which makes me sound like the worst mother ever). I really need to be more intentional about this. Motherhood is my full-time (and most important) job and these sweet boys deserve a Mommy who is actually present.

MILESTONES

This has been a big month for his sensory development. He finally has some hand-eye coordination and loves laying on his play mat and batting at his toys. He smiles and laughs when we tickle his belly and blow raspberries. We also gave solid foods a try! So far, he's tried rice cereal mixed with breastmilk and some sweet potatoes. He seemed to like both, but still hasn't quite gotten the hang of this whole spoon thing. 

STATS

Crosby won't visit the doctor again until his 6-month appointment, but according to our bathroom scale he's weighing in around 15 lbs 13 oz. He's still in Size 2 diapers and pretty much exclusively 6-month clothing, although even some of those are starting to look tight! I feel like I just broke out the 6-month onesies and sleepers and I'm already going to have to sort through Charlie's 6-9 month hand-me-downs!

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Happy 5 months, Crosby Loren! I have so enjoyed this last month of smiles, laughs, and snuggles with you. I'm so excited to see what this month has in store for us.

Can we all take a minute to appreciate this outtake that makes Crosby look like an evil villain? Haha!

What I Read | January Check-In

It feels strange not to have my usual list of book challenge categories to cross off. As you may remember, one of my 2017 goals was to hit the pause button on reading challenges for a little while. I found that I wasn't enjoying a lot of what I was reading and I wanted to get back to solely reading for pleasure. Not committing to a reading challenge in January really didn't alter the frequency or the quantity that I read, but it did feel liberating to give up on books that I lost interest in, or completely change course when something new struck my fancy.

Here's what I read in January:

Talking as Fast as I Can by Lauren Graham (★★★)

I'm not sure what exactly I was expecting but I felt a little disappointed. The whole book felt like a cobbled-together attempt to capitalize on the buzz around the Gilmore Girls revival. She did get me excited about the possibility of more future Gilmore Girls, but that was about it.

It Ends With Us by Colleen Hoover (★★★★★)

I am so thankful to have just finished a book I couldn't put down for the first time in awhile. There are so many things I want to say, but don't want to spoil the plot. The protagonist was wonderful and gave so much insight into women in situations like hers. Frankly, all the characters were fantastically written. The author's note at the end made the entire book for me, however. This was one of those books that just needed to be written. I will definitely be reading more from this author.

March: Book One by John Lewis (★★★★★)

I've never read a graphic novel before, but this was the absolute best one to start with. Written by Congressman John Lewis, this three-book series tells his story through animated flashbacks of his involvement in the Civil Rights movement of the 1960's. This book read quickly and was absolutely fantastic. I'm planning to read the other two ASAP and purchase the series so that my boys can read it when they get older. I have been so fired up with everything happening in our government right now. With the Women's March fresh in my mind, I am so glad I picked up this book when I did. 

7: An Experimental Mutiny Against Excess by Jen Hatmaker (★★★★★) 

Chuck and I have been on a kind of self-imposed budget trim down. That's what happens when you try living off of one income. However, as we've been reviewing our past spending habits, we've had to face the fact that we've been completely irresponsible with our money when we've had it and are trying to reform our ways. We want to be good stewards and this book came at the perfect time. Hatmaker sets out to eliminate excess in seven areas of her life and documents her endeavor through a diary-style narrative. It was so motivating for me to get our own finances under control and nudge us in the direction of a more simple, less wasteful lifestyle.


Scrappy Little Nobody by Anna Kendrick (★★★★)

As far as celebrity memoirs go, this is a good one. It felt authentic, light-hearted and not overly cheesy, much like Kendrick herself. I particularly loved the chapters in which she talked about her past relationships and how she grew from them.






Currently, I'm alternating between The Nesting Place by Myquillyn Smith and The Handmaid's Tale by Margaret Atwood. What are you reading?

#WhyIMarch(ed)

This past weekend, I participated in the Women's March on Washington's sister march in Cincinnati. Obviously, I would have loved to be in DC where the action was, but with two little guys who need their Mama, it just wasn't realistic. So a couple of my friends and I piled into a minivan, I strapped Crosby to my chest and away we marched. The day before the march, the Facebook event said approximately 6,000 participants were expected. Obviously, there's no way to pinpoint an exact number, but some estimated shows appoximately 12,000-14,000 in attendance. My group and I were toward the front of the march and as we completed the 1.5 mile loop, some participants were only just starting. It was crazy! Nothing compared to the hundreds of thousands in DC, LA, and Chicago, but more than enough for me.

Although my husband expressed interest in attending, I was apprehensive about bringing Charlie and was glad I didn't. It was a LOT of people. That being said, it was the most harmonious, unified, and peaceful protest I've experienced. It was very family-friendly and I witnessed several other Mommies with their babies strapped to their chests, as well as a lot more men than I was anticipating. We stood in Washington Park and listened to several speakers representing organizations such as Planned Parenthood, Black Lives Matter, and the Cincinnati Islamic Center (as well as locally elected officials, an organization for disability rights, worker's rights and a few others that I'm forgetting). Once the march began, there were chants of "Love trumps hate" and "This is what democracy looks like." It filled me with such hope to be in solidarity which such a large group of people fighting for equality and justice in this country.

Prior to the event, people who were planning to march used the hashtag #WhyIMarch to explain their reasons for choosing to participate. I had my own reasons.

1. Because I am a sexual assault survivor who believes that no person should be victimized because of their gender.

2. Because I am raising two sweet boys who will be taught to fully understand what consent means.

3. Because I want to stand in solidarity with my Muslim sisters, my black sisters, my native sisters, and my Latina sisters who have been told that they don't belong. They do.

4. Because I want to protest an administration that openly discriminates against and objectifies half of the citizens it has sworn to protect.

5. Because I want to look back in 10, 20, 30+ years and know that I was on the right side of history.

6. Because I want to be an example for two impressionable children who will no longer be able to look up to the President as a model of decent, gracious, and kind behavior.

7. Because I believe that a woman's body belongs to her and her only.

It has since been reported that approximately 2.5 million people turned out worldwide for this event and I am so glad I can say that I was a part of this movement. However, I was also convicted by a friend who posted that this movement was primarily white women and it was now up to us to fight alongside women of color in their fight for equality.

Smashing the patriarchy is exhausting.

Did you march? What was your experience?

CROSBY | 4 Months

STAY-AT-HOME MOTHERHOOD

I already feel so much more comfortable and content in this role than I did a month ago. I have some professional projects and potential opportunities in the works, so fingers crossed that I can continue to use this brain for something other than figuring out how to switch between our DVD player and Amazon Fire Stick so that Charlie can watch Frozen for the umpteenth time.

BREASTFEEDING

No real change here. Crosby still wakes up 3-4 times/night to eat which is a bummer for someone who requires a full 8 hours to function in life. I read a little bit about sleep training, but the thing is- he doesn't have difficulty falling asleep or staying asleep, he's just always hungry! I wonder if it's because my breastmilk maybe isn't as fatty or calorie-laden as other women's? Is that a thing?

BABY FAT

I got down to my lowest weight since college and then the holidays happened. Now that they're over and done, we're back to not eating snacks and sweets. Couple that with chasing Crosby's older brother around and the weight is practically melting off! Haha

As for Crosby...

Those chubby thighs!!!

LIFE

It really is amazing how two babies can be so different. Charlie was pretty independent, even as a baby while Crosby quite literally wants to be held all the time. As someone whose love language is not physical touch, this has been tough for me. I want to be able to set him down to be productive and accomplish things around the house and he is not having it. I've finally resigned myself to the fact that I need to stop being the Mom I want to be, and start being the Mom Crosby needs me to be. Plus, I know there will come a day when he won't want my snugs. My days have become a lot less productive, but a lot more cuddle-filled and my sweet boy is happier for it.

MILESTONES

He rolled over!!! Another huge difference between the boys is that Crosby loves tummy time. He's constantly got his head up and looking around, so I've been putting him on our bed with a few toys and he loves it. He's also been chatting up a storm. The volume level in our home has increased significantly this month as he's started playing with his voice. 

STATS

He had his 4-month appointment on Friday where he weighed in at 14 lbs 10 oz. Size-wise, he's in the awkward stage of being too big for 3-month clothing and too small for 6-months so he's been wearing some combination of both. He's also in Size 2 diapers. I was trying to stretch the stock of Size 1's I had for as long as I could, but he has long outgrown them so we ended up donating the unused diapers to our local homeless shelter.

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Happy 4 months, Crosby Loren! Can't wait to see what surprises you have in store with us this month!

17 Goals for 2017

I admit, I am a New Years' resolution nay-sayer. My theory is this: if you can't resolve to do something at another time during the year, what makes you think you'll be successful on January 1? I think any goal worth committing to needs more motivation and incentive behind it than the beginning of a calendar year. Which I realize sounds completely cynical, but it's honest.

That being said, I do believe in goal-setting and there are things I'd like to see happen for myself in 2017. (Does that sound completely contradictory?)

PROFESSIONAL
Because although I am doing the SAHM thing, I'm still an ambitious person and strive to use this time to build skills and commit to projects and opportunities that I haven't had time for in the past.

1. Submit a grant proposal. This is also one of my 30 Before 30 goals. I've never done any grant writing in the past. However, the fact that I love to write and that I want to further my career in the nonprofit world makes this goal a no-brainer. What better way to combine my two passions than grant writing? I have some friends that work and volunteer for local non-profits, so I'm hoping to use those relationships to work my way in and do some volunteer grant writing to get some practice and build my portfolio. 
2. Continue working with my former employer. I'm not exactly sure what this will look like just yet. However, there was some discussion before I left of me doing some temporary work when a co-worker goes on medical leave. There also may be opportunities for me to do some consulting, so fingers crossed that this works out! 
3. Apply for Advocacy Corps. Advocacy Corps is a program of the Friends Committee on National Legislation. Although I have my degree in Political Science, I've never done any kind of lobbying or political organizing so this part-time role could be an amazing opportunity for me (if I get in!). I'm currently working on my application, so keep your fingers crossed!

READING
I already mentioned my reading goals for 2017, but for the sake of having them all in one place (and because I don't expect that people read every single one of my book posts...), here they are again.

1. Read 52 books in the year. This averages to a book a week, which is definitely a stretch, but I read 60 books in 2016 so I think I can pull it off.
2. Hit the pause button on reading challenges. I am hardcore addicted to reading challenges (as you may have noticed), but seeing that they caused me to read several books that I didn't enjoy has forced me to reevaluate. I like that they force me outside my reading comfort zone. But I also really don't see the point in reading books that I don't enjoy. I'm not swearing them off for good because they're great motivation to skip Netflix and opt for a book instead. But I want to focus on only reading books that I want to, and not because I feel obligated to. 

FINANCIAL
Now that our household is down to one income and I'm more closely monitoring our budgeting and spending, I want to get more serious about the financial goals that we've shrugged off the past few years.

1. Pay off a credit card. Obviously I would love if we could pay off more debt than just one credit card, but since money is tight, I would be content with just one less monthly bill to pay. 
2. Open up college savings accounts for the boys. I still haven't even opened one up for Charlie, so this should happen sooner rather than later. 

BLOGGING

I've long since given up on growing my blog. I don't have the know-how nor the desire to do all the work required to gain a huge following. That being said, I don't want to stop improving as a blogger, or writer so I do have some blogging goals.

1. Publish at least 3 posts per week. I really hope to become better at publishing content more regularly. When I was working full-time, I was lucky if I published a post a week. Now that I'm home all the time, I'll have more opportunity to write.
2. Have one of my DMB posts garner more than 1,000 pageviews. In July, I started writing for Dayton Moms Blog. In October, my post Why We Chose Not to Share Our Baby's Name received 971 pageviews- just shy of 1,000. I've absolutely loved writing for DMB. It's forced me to write more thoughtful content and I really do think it's helping me to improve as a writer. I would love to see DMB's readership continue to grow and for one of my posts to get at least 1,000 pageviews in a month!

HEALTH

Currently, I actually weigh less than my pre-pregnancy weight, but I'm not in great shape. I want to find a realistic way to balance getting my fitness on with the sheer exhaustion of keeping these humans of mine alive.

1. Do the splits. Yep, one hundred years ago I was a high school cheerleader who could do the splits. I now can't touch my toes. So that feels awesome. Setting a goal to do the splits feels like a tangible goal I can work toward that's more specific than "improve my flexibility."
2. Run 13 miles. Since we're pinching pennies, paying to run a half marathon doesn't rank on the top of my priorities (even though I would love to do one eventually). So if I can get back into good enough shape to run 13 miles independently, that would make me more than happy!
3. Hit my goal weight. I've been using my Fitbit to track my weight loss. Weight loss isn't as important to me as just generally being more toned and in better shape, but I wouldn't hate it if I could shed about five more pounds.

HOME

We've lived in our house for nearly a year and a half and it's ever so slowly coming together but there are a million and one things I'd like to do to make it more of a home. I have some really fun ideas (posts to come!). I'm doing things little by little as I have the time, and money for home improvement stuff and decor.

1. Convert basement into playroom. I have a really fun vision for our awkward semi-finished basement that involves chalkboard paint and foam flooring!
2. Finish painting and designing upstairs bedroom. So far, I've already removed an ugly light fixture and wallpaper border. I plan to remove some paneling, prime and paint all the walls, turn the fireplace into a chalkboard, and eventually install a window (because weirdly, there is no window in the room).
3. Plant a backyard garden. This past summer was the first summer in our house and I was hugely pregnant, so obviously that didn't happen. But I now feel like Charlie will be a perfect age to love getting dirty and watching our seeds turn into tomatoes, peppers, and onions. I can't wait!

MARRIAGE

After two kiddos, there is zero time for romance. Period. On our last anniversary date, both my hubby and I committed to one date night per month and haven't been great with you know, having a kid and all.

1. Go on monthly dates. The key here is getting out of the house. Because time spent together at home binge-watching The Office does not count as a date. This means there needs to be a change of location, I need to be wearing makeup, and it needs to be just the two of us.
2. Take a weekend getaway for our fifth anniversary. Every year we say we're going to get out of town to celebrate our anniversary, and without fail, every year as the day comes closer, we push it off and don't do it. Since 5 is a nice round number, it's happening!

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What are your goals for 2017?