Have you heard the quote “Comparison is the thief of joy?” It’s been on my mind a lot lately as I’ve been contemplating my place in the Blogger world. Our lives are pretty uneventful right now, which has its pros and cons. Regardless, I’m finding blogging inspiration few and far between these days. All I’m doing is reading other blogs and making feeble attempts to grow my own. And I’m finding that rather than serving as a source of joy in my life like it used to, blogging has morphed into the thief of my joy. I’ve spent money I don’t have to try and bribe people who don’t give two shits about what I have to say. I’ve felt less than stellar about my lack of cute outfits, my lack of bumpdates, my lack of a perfectly DIY-ed home. And I’m having a hard time remembering what I ever wrote about. What has kept me coming back to this place?
I’ve been considering taking a blogging hiatus for a little while. Which makes me a little sad, because I hate that something that used to make me feel so fulfilled just doesn’t anymore. I hate that I’ve become more focused on numbers than just doing what I love. But mostly, I hate that what should be an opportunity to delight in the lives of other ladies putting themselves out there for the world has become an ugly competition to me. I hate that comparison is stealing my joy.
|This face pretty accurately sums up where I am right now.|
I'm going to pray on this for a little while. I'm going to pray that God helps me to find contentedness and peace with my story and my voice as a blogger. I'm going to pray that when I view the stories of the amazing network of ladies I've gotten to know, I'll be inspired and not plagued with feelings of inadequacy. I'm going to pray that somehow blogging will stop stealing my joy.