I have to say, as much as a 2-hour round trip commute can stink, it does allow for some good time to pray, meditate and reflect.This morning I sat talking to God and pondering His timing. I talk a lot about my time in Uganda on this blog, because it deeply and profoundly changed me. But what I haven’t mentioned was that I did not go when I had intended to.
|Have I mentioned how beautiful Uganda was?|
You see, I knew from about the day I stepped foot on Eastern’s campus that I was going to study abroad. And I was going to study abroad in Africa. The rest of the details would fall into place, but this I knew for a fact. As my sophomore year drew to a close, I had settled on the Uganda Studies Program at Uganda Christian University. I applied for the Fall 2008 semester and then I waited.
I was in the library printing off a paper after class one afternoon weeks later when I decided to check my e-mail. I opened up what I knew with 100% certainty was my acceptance letter to USP Fall ’08. Instead, I was informed that I had been wait-listed and could reapply for the Spring semester.
Devastated was an understatement as I sought out a dark, empty corner of the library building and cried hysterically. I was so sure this was the plan…until it wasn’t.
But as life often does, it went on.
I accepted a position with my college’s Conferences Department and spent the summer working on campus and growing close to a boy we’ll call “Abe.” When Fall began, I had made peace with the fact that although it was not according to my timeline, I was going to Uganda. Right after I found out I had been accepted into the Spring 2009 program, Abe and I began dating.
|Not at all relevant, but this was taken the summer Abe and I met.|
I believe Abe was the reason my Uganda semester was postponed. If I had gone off to the Pearl of Africa in the Fall, we never would have become an item. And in the grand scheme of things, I needed to date Abe.
My relationship with Abe was filled with panic attacks, counseling, self-harming and a month-long break-up. It was not good. Abe is a good man, and I still consider him a friend. But I had a lot of demons I was working through when we began our relationship, and to put it bluntly, he was not right for me.
So why do I look back on our courtship with such positivity? Because, I believe in God’s timing. I believe that I needed to date Abe. I needed to experience a wrong relationship so that a couple years later, when the right one came along, I knew with absolute certainty: I had found my husband.
I realize this is a long-winded glimpse into my prior dating life…or lack thereof. But as I anxiously await some changes in my life, I look back on this time in my life with the knowledge that timing is everything.
And while patience is not my strong point, I have complete faith that God’s timing will work out perfectly.
Just as it always does.