6.11.2012

Blog Censorship?

My blogging has been incredibly sporadic lately, and for any of you who actually actively follow me, I apologize. I've had so much on my mind recently. Quitting my part-time job, anxiously awaiting news of a new, big girl job, sorting out wedding details and trying to figure out our honeymoon plans when we don't know if I'll even have time off to take a honeymoon and don't know if we can even pay for it! My mind is a jumbled mess right now! (#Firstworldproblems, much?)

One thing I know is, I love to write. It's cathartic. It helps me sort out my thoughts and by blogging, I can seek the advice and honesty of other fellow bloggers. I live my life as an open book. I love myself and my life and I'm proud of the decisions I've made that have brought me to this place. I treat my blog similarly. While I love the superficial wedding details and cutesy link-ups, this blog is my opportunity to write what I feel. Write my experiences. I'm just as candid with the dozens of bloggers who follow me as I am with my real-life friends and family. It never occurred to me that maybe I shouldn't be.

I've started to wonder if some of the things I've written, should not have been posted. (I.e. Sex and sex). Many of the comments I received regarding these posts were blog friends telling me how brave I was for writing this. My aim was not to give readers a glimpse into our bedroom, but to honestly and openly talk about a very important facet of marriage that isn't often spoken about. It's hard to talk about this topic and not get a little personal, but I also realize that perhaps there are some things better left unsaid?

I need some help on this. Is it better to be honest, open and candid about my feelings about every part of my upcoming marriage? Or should I ensure that the privacy of my hubby-to-be and our marriage is first and foremost? I could really use some insight on this.

5 comments:

  1. I just went back and read those posts and I think they were beautifully written. Do not regret for one second the things you put out there. It's so nice to hear someone else who seems to share the same morals and convictions as me talk about their experiences. My H and I are about to celebrate our 2nd anniversary, but we lived together before we were married as well. My parents didn't like it one bit, but the couple from our church the performed our premarital counseling didn't have a problem with it, and said "Who are we to judge?" It meant so much that they weren't judging us and were so happy to see us get married.

    All in all it's definitely better to be honest and to be yourself. Also talk to your hubby-to-be and see what he's comfortable with in terms of your blog material.

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  2. I think that having the balls to speak out such topics anywhere, not just on a blog is amazing. You're absolutely right. People don't talk about that stuff. And they should. Having grown up in a pretty conservative home, sex wasn't talked about. Not as a good thing, or a bad thing. It just wasn't talked about. So upon getting married and venturing into my first experience with it, it was extremely awkward. And it continued to be for several months afterward. My husband also grew up in a very conservative family. It was such an awkward, taboo, unspoken subject that we couldn't even discuss our concerns, happiness, or desires with each other, let alone anyone else.

    As long as Chuck knows and doesn't mind, I think that's all that matters. People appreciate and respect honesty and people being real.

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  3. I just recently started following you but my personal opinion on blogging about your marriage is that some things can be blogged about and some things shouldn't. You guys are just starting out and don't want to have others involved in too much of your personal business. As I already stated, some things are good blog about simply because it can reach out to other young women at the same stage as you... Ultimately, the decision on what to blog and what not blog is on you. God bless!

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  4. As someone with a LOT of female friends who are extremely candid, open and often vulgar about their sex lives, I am really used to this sort of thing. I have always been surrounded with open, honest people and though Im a virgin, sex talk has never been on hold with pretty much anyone I am close to.

    Maybe that is not okay, it is not for everyone, but it's SEX talk. Everyone has sex. It can be a beautiful part of life and being open about it can make it that much better.

    From my perspective, you are not being too open about sex. Whenever you have brought it up, it is always very tasteful. Honestly.

    Yes, some things are better left unsaid, but you are leaving SO much unsaid! Should you type up a blog everytime you and your husband to be have a fight? No. That's just tacky. But I think you have a very good grasp on how much to share. Whether its choosing bridesmaids dresses for your wedding or your sex life - you always keep it classy and interesting.

    I like to reach out to my readers - let the know they are not alone, and to feel like I'm not. I like to relate to them. Everyone thinks about sex and relationships and a lot of us are involved in one, the other or both, so it can definitely be a way to relate to your readers.

    That's just my "honesty is best" opinion. It's YOUR blog - always do what is best for you :)

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  5. Honestly I was pretty surprised that you posted that on your blog, but mainly because I was like woah I could never do that!

    It is important with your blog and all things internet to remember that everything you post is completely public for all the world to see, which includes any and all family and friends, employers, pastors, future children...the list goes on. But as long as everything you post is what you would feel comfortable sharing with these people than go ahead and post away.

    Also like some others said, be sure Chuck is okay with any relationship related stuff that gets posted because it is just as much his private life as it is yours.

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